tonight's the night!

Hello friends! Tonight the Air 1 interview I taped a few months back will air on two radio stations - KLOVE (88.7) @ 5:30 and again on Air 1 (89.5) @ 6:30

This is so exciting!

Twenty five minutes of sharing the Lord's heart for the fatherless.

Twenty five minutes of encouraging the body of Christ

to do something to meet the great need, both here and abroad.

Twenty five minutes - that's a lot of time.

I lived for so many years unaware, or ignoring, the needs right in our own backyard. Right here, in Bakersfield, CA. Then as we have journeyed the adoption road, to be made so aware of the dire need of so many orphans around the world. It can be overwhelming. What can one person do? Surely little 'ol me can't do much to make a dent in the enormous need. 

Let me assure you - everyone can do something. 

We may not all adopt or foster, but we can all do something to bring the hope and love of Jesus to a child in need. I am praying for those who hear the message tonight. Praying that their hearts would be stirred to do something. Praying that in the twenty five minutes of air time, many would hear the Lord say to them, "this is what I want for you!"

Lord Jesus, speak to your people!

If you are able, listen in. If not, join with me in praying that we would see God raise up many to care for the least of these.

(A great prayer guide is available at Cry of the Orphan.)

Thanks for praying!

To God be the glory, great things He has done!

the forgotten initiative

Well, the whole reason I started this blog in the first place was to announce that a wonderful ministry called The Forgotten Initiative was coming to Bakersfield. So, its only right that I update you all now on how it is going.


In short, the Lord has been working and moving and opening doors for us to serve the forgotten in our community! We have begun our first project ~ Journey Bags! These backpacks will be packed by people all over our community and given to children who have been removed from their homes. It is thrilling for me to watch the Lord give vision and inspiration to many whose hearts are burdened by the great need. 


We will also begin gathering donations and volunteers to makeover the visitation rooms at two separate locations! Such a great opportunity for every member of the body of Christ to use their talents and resources to tell the families and children in foster care that they are special and loved by Jesus. 


Lastly, the Department of Human Services asked us to put together teams to mentor birth parents that have been reunited with their children. This is so exciting to me - they are giving us the names of the broken, hurting, and lost in Bakersfield and asking us to get into their lives. 

Oh, Lord, 

may the gospel be spread throughout this city! 

May many come to a saving faith in Jesus Christ. 

I wish I could tell you all that is happening, but my mind is mush and it would take much more time than I have to type it all out. Your prayers for TFI and all who are serving the foster care system are so appreciated. Remember the precious little ones who are displaced, through no fault of their own. Please pray, too, for the relatives who so often take care of these children when they are removed from their homes. In my conversations with DHS, it has been brought to my attention that so often family members take placement of their relatives and just how needy these families are. 


It is my deepest prayer that through the tangible things we do, all would know that Jesus loves them. He died for them and has a plan for their lives -each and every one of  the social workers, the children, the foster parents, the biological parents are so very special to Him. 


May His name be made famous in this city - and in cities across the United States as more TFI advocates join the family. 


If you are interested in learning more about The Forgotten Initiative - look  HERE
Or follow us on facebook - HERE

Lastly, this song has been playing in my head like crazy lately - the lyrics are the prayer of my heart for myself and all who name the name of Jesus. 

Lord break our hearts til it moves our hands and feet.

For the hopeless and the broken, 

for the ones who don't know that You love them, 

bring Your love to life inside of me.

well, that was awkward...

That was Nic's comment after a stranger approached us at Walmart and began questioning our family dynamics. 


You see, Nic hasn't been around for the last year since Levi joined our family. He hasn't had multiple opportunities to hear people's comments or respond to their questions. He is only here a short while - and while he is totally in love with his little brother - he isn't quite sure what to make of the unfiltered questions, comments, and stares we get when we are out together. 


When Levi first came home, I was keenly aware of the "looks" our family got everywhere we went. At first I was self-conscience about it and dreaded the idea of anyone asking questions. It didn't take long before I didn't even notice anymore. Oh, I am sure people still looked and wondered and many asked, but I didn't care. He was our son and I would gladly accept the "is he your's" questions, because by golly, Yes, he is our's! 


Fast forward a few months...and I am left wondering how to answer these questions. Not for my sake, but for his. He is still young enough not to understand, but those days are passing quickly and soon, very soon, he will not only hear, but understand what is being asked/implied. How do I respond? I never want Levi to feel like being adopted is something to hide or be ashamed of. Yet, does every curious stranger need to know his personal story. Where does his privacy fit in with answering the questions of a stranger? I have been wrestling with this for a while now. I asked it at our last adoption support group. It will be the topic for next month's meeting - hopefully with some good answers/advice from the social workers and other families. Then just last week, I read the very same questions from another adoptive mom on her blog. What a comfort to know that I am not alone - yet, there is still the very real issue of facing these situations on a regular basis. 


Then I was reminded of a quote I read on an adoption blog, 

Our family has the privilege of telling the story

of God's redemption and grace

every time someone questions our family dynamics." 

The questions and their implications don't have to be about me, or even about Levi - the answers can always be about God. It is a privilege to share what the Lord has done for us and Levi. I pray that whatever the question, whatever the awkward comment, whatever the motive I would be able to point people to Jesus. I hope that the uniqueness of our family would give us many opportunities to share the gospel and be a light for Him. 

Like the time the young African American man at Target asked me about Levi. When I told him that we had adopted Levi, he said to me (very sincerely and humbly), "So you love him and stuff? Like, you hold him and carry him around and stuff?" It saddened me to think this young man would have to wonder about an adoptive mom's love for her son. I don't know what his experiences were/are. I don't know why that was the question he most wanted answered, but I pray that my response caused him to think differently about foster/adoptive families and more importantly that he heard of Jesus' love that day. Our encounter was brief, but I pray that it made a lasting impact on his heart. 

We will most certainly always get funny looks, prying questions, and well-meaning strangers who are trying to understand our family situation. I want what we say and how we respond to be the example for Levi as he grows. We are not embarrassed or ashamed of his story. It is a story that points to the Lord's grace and protection - one of answered prayers and God's plan for a little boy and the family that loves him to pieces! 

To God be the glory, great things He has done! 

ramblings

It has been a busy couple of weeks.


Nic is here from Oregon. So good to see him and spend time with him. It has been way too long since he has been here. The girls LOVE their big brother and Levi thinks "Nee" is the best ever! He runs to him calling, "Nee, Nee, Nee" arms up and full of smiles. So special.














We celebrated Lexie's 11th birthday. Our cake bakin' girl made her first 4 tiered cake ever! Complete with different flavors, frosting, and piping. Lexie is growing up to be so much like her daddy and big brother. They know no stranger, love to eat, have great senses of humor, and are all around easy to like!

Next was Kenadie's 13th birthday. Yikes - we officially have a teenager. I am looking forward to these years being great! Kenadie is soft to the things of the Lord and truly desires to live for Him. What a blessing it is to watch her grow in her love and understanding of the things of the Lord. On her birthday she and I went shopping for her first "real" make-up. The light, shimmery eye shadow and lip gloss look lovely on her. She is beautiful. She is growing up for sure. :)






Let's see...what else has been eating up our time? Oh yes, after 10 years of driving our Toyota Sienna, we decided it was time for an upgrade. We searched, and searched and feel blessed to have found another Sienna for a great price. It is white (which I love - my only other choice would have been red - I love anything red) and has 8 passenger seating. Great for all the extra kiddos we cart around. I love that we have room for another little one should the Lord call us to foster/adopt again. Right now we can not take anymore because, according to the state of CA, our house is full. We are looking into adding a den and 4th bedroom to the back of the house. Exciting stuff!

Well, the weather is way too beautiful to stay inside and waste time on the computer. The kids have eaten, Kenadie is finishing up the dishes, Lexie just took her Reading Test, and we are headed to the park! Love these spring days in Bakersfield!

proud of my girl

Every Sunday after church we have lunch at my parents' house. Dad cooks, mom cleans up, and my kids and my brother's kids play the afternoon away. It has been this way every Sunday for the 11 years we have lived here. I love that my kids will grow up with memories of special days at Grandma and Grandpa's house. The plaque on the door of their house says, "Grandpa and Grandma's Place, always time for kids." And that is the truth. All 8 grandchildren love being there! 


A couple of Sundays ago the weather was beautiful and the lemon tree in the backyard was loaded down with lemons, so the girls asked if they could pick some and make lemonade. They worked hard squeezing the gigantic lemons into a pitcher. Eventually they had made enough lemonade that they decided to have a lemonade stand. They made signs, got a "money box", set up a table and waited for customers. My parents live at the end of a cul-de-sac. (not many drive-bys). 


The little girl from across the street was over for the afternoon and since she knows the neighbors she started going door to door selling the little cups of homemade lemonade. In her excitement, the neighbor girl told some folks that they were selling it for "the old people." She had $2 that somebody had donated - they didn't even want a cup of lemonade. Immediately, our girls (Lexie and my two nieces) said, "You can't do that. That is a lie. We weren't giving it to old people, we were going to split  the money up." (I was standing just a few feet away so I had the privilege of listening to the whole conversation.) The neighbor girl is not being raised in a Christian home - she saw nothing wrong with telling people a "story" to get them to buy a drink. But our girls - oh how proud I am of them - they told her to take the money back. She didn't want to. So without a second  thought our girls decided to really donate the money. They began chattering back and forth about ideas of who they could give the money to - how they could use it to bless "old people" or kids in the hospital. And just like that, it was decided. They would donate the money. 


When it was all said and done they had raised $14.25. My nieces had raised $10 a few days earlier and Lexie wanted to give her $6 too. So now they had $30.00 to donate. (as I type this, Kenadie (who was at youth camp when this happened) just gave $5.00 too!) Grand total  - $35.25! 


A few days later my sister-in-law called the Children's Hospital here in town to ask about what they needed. She finally heard back from them today and guess what! They girls are going to be on the news tomorrow morning! We will be heading to IHOP where news crew will be to interview the girls. IHOP partners with The Children's Miracle Network by having Pancake Day. The serve free pancakes and ask that people would donate to The Children's Miracle Network after they eat. The timing of their lemonade stand and Pancake Day just happens to be perfect - no surprise to the Lord or to us! The girls will have a few minutes to share their story and then they will hand the money over right then and there! They are over the moon excited! They get to be on TV!!!!!


The best part of it all is that the Lord is rewarding them for doing the right thing. He is showing these girls at their tender ages that He is pleased with them and He delights in blessing them. They are learning the great truth - It is more blessed to give than to receive! 


So, I wrote that last night...it is now Tuesday morning and we just got back from IHOP. The girls were interviewed live on one TV channel and recorded for another. They even got to be interviewed on a local radio station. And the whole family ate free pancakes! 


The lady in charge of Children Hospital here in Bakersfield and I had the opportunity to talk a bit after the interviews were over. She marveled at the timing of it all and I was able to share that the Lord is always right on time! She said their $35 may as well be $3,500 - she is so blessed by their generosity and hopes that others will be inspired to give as well. It is a reminder that every dollar counts. No amount is too small. It makes me think about all those who have given to help families bring home a little one from another country. Or those who will pack a journey bag for a foster child or send a birthday card. Or those who sponsor children in far away lands. We can all make a difference. We can all be that little boy who shares his lunch with Jesus - and watch Him bless and multiply it. 


I hope my girls always remember the day Jesus honored their honesty and desire to do what was right. I hope the lesson learned today is not "don't lie" but rather the Lord delights in blessing His children. He went above and beyond to show 4 little girls that He loves them and is pleased with them. As a mom, I am so blessed to have witnessed the whole discussion between the girls that day. I am so proud of them for doing what was right. And I love that the Lord blessed them the way He did today. 


(a good mom would have remembered her camera and video camera...hopefully we can get a copy of the broadcast or find a link to it on their website)


To God be the glory, great things He has done!

one year ago

Today is a special anniversary for us in the DeCarlo family. One year ago today we first snuggled our little guy. One year ago today I sat in my van talking to a woman who will always have a special place in my heart. Lacy, Levi's foster mom and I chatted about Levi as I sat in the parking lot of the fairgrounds in Visalia. My girls were inside watching a horse show and I was huddled up in my car (it was a cold, gray day). I remember Lacy telling me, "there's just something about him." At the time I didn't really understand what she meant. He was, after all, only 4 months old and I couldn't quite figure out how different could he really be from other 4 months old? It didn't take long at all for us to see that Levi has been blessed with an endearing personality. Everybody who knows him, and plenty of strangers too, are drawn to him.  He's a flirt, and a ham and he loves laughing and making people laugh with him. There really is something about him! 


I had stared at Levi's picture - the one my social worker sent to me - for a week, waiting for approval from the county to have him placed in our home. You see, as soon as his foster parents knew he was being moved to adoptions, they wanted him to be with his forever family as soon as possible. They knew how special everyday is with little ones - and they wanted him to have every opportunity to bond with his family. I am so thankful for their hearts. They loved him while he was with them and handed him over to us knowing that was best for him! How selfless. Such a beautiful example of sacrificial love. 


Before Levi, the Whitbey family had loved a little girl for nearly a year. She was reunited with a family member. After Levi, they had another baby boy whom they loved and treasured for 6 months before handing him into the arms of his adoptive family. I love the Whitbeys for what they do for these little ones. They truly have the heart of Jesus. Fostering isn't easy. Loving a little one, knowing they won't be staying, must rip your heart out. And yet, this family continues to do the hard thing. Someone once told me, "It's never wrong to love a child." For a day, for a year, for life. Precious Whitbey family, the Lord is pleased with you - thank you for loving His little lambs. 


I does my heart good to remember how faithful the Lord has been to us and to Levi through this journey - rejoice with me as I remind myself of His goodness!  


~It was January 2010 when I began to feel the Lord prompting me again to foster/adopt.
~I prayed for 6 months that the Lord would add to our family through adoption 
~I prayed that this would not just be "my thing" but that Dominic and I would be united
~We were finally certified in October 2010
(Looking back now, it is so cool for me to see the Lord's perfect timing - all those months I prayed were the exact months that Levi was being carried in his birth-mom's womb. He was conceived in January and born in October. While I didn't carry him in my womb - I carried him in my heart and in my prayers for those 9 months. Isn't that just the way the Lord works? Preparing us as He prepared Levi to enter the world!) 


~My song while we waited was "Our God" by Chris Tomlin. Every time it came on the radio I prayed, I dreamed, and I prayed some more for our little one. Months later, at a Harvest Crusade I was blessed to hear Chris Tomlin perform it live while Levi clapped and danced in my arms. I was moved to tears as I held him, thinking about how perfectly the Lord had heard and answered all my prayers. The private ones, the fears, the doubts, the requests that he be protected from whatever he was being exposed to...And there he was, in my arms - every prayer answered beyond what I could ask or think! 


~Tomorrow will be one year that Levi has been home with us. His foster parents brought him over at 4:00 in the afternoon - it was a Friday. We videotaped the car pulling up, Levi being taken out of the van, and the three of them walking up to the front door. We have video tapes of the girls' births - this was for us, his birth video! Such a treasured memory. Once inside, he snuggled up with Lexie and fell asleep. The next few months feel like a blur of bottles, burp clothes, sleepless nights and the best dimpled smile from a little boy we all love like crazy! 


~October 21, 2010 - not only did we celebrate Levi's first birthday, we were doubly blessed to celebrate the finalization of his adoption. Just 8 short months after coming home, he was officially our son - forever. With all the rights of a natural born child. What a beautiful reminder of what has been done for us as children of God. That day in court, the judge repeatedly called Levi by his given name. I winced every time - didn't he know that we were changing his name? Should I speak up and say something? Over and over he referred to him by his "old" name. But then, at the very end, the judge said, "With my signature I declare that he is no longer (insert old name) but shall hence forth be known as Levi Joseph DeCarlo." And with that the courtroom erupted with cheers and claps! 


Thank you, Lord for the new life you have given Levi. Thank you Lord that You have done the same for all those who know Jesus as Savior. You have given us a new name, an inheritance with your son Jesus, and brought us into your family! 


Here are some pictures of Levi through the year! Our little man, how we love you. 

The Lord has done great things for us and we are full of joy!

Psalms 126:3

an invitation

I have been thinking about this post for awhile. I have been thinking about our responsibility as Christians - our calling. I read so many blogs about adoption and the message is the same eye-opening, convicting, inspiring message on all of them. "God's heart is for the orphan! He instituted adoption! Our very identity is found in the fact that we are adopted into His family - co-heirs with Jesus." To all of this I say "AMEN!" 


But then there is the feelings of guilt that all too often follow. If I know these things to be true - if I really believe and agree with them, why am I not doing more. Why isn't my house full of once orphaned-now adopted sons and daughters!? 

"Once our eyes are open we can not pretend we don't know what to do.

 God, who weighs our hearts and keeps our souls, 

knows what we know and holds us responsible to act."  Proverbs 24:12

This verse is used so many times on adoption blogs and while I know the intent, it can sadly bring condemnation. 

"There is therefore now no condemnation 

for those who are in Christ Jesus." Romans 8:1

Conviction is from the Lord. It is Him gently saying, "I have a better way, a better plan. This is not My best for you. Do it My way and see how blessed you'll be, child." Condemnation is not from Him. It is satan whispering, sometimes yelling, in our ear, "You are not good enough. You are not doing enough. Just look at "her", she is so much more godly than you." This is an easy place to go in the adoption world. Everywhere you look other families have adopted more children than you - kids with special needs, teenagers, the hard cases. We've adopted one -one, cute, easy baby boy with no special needs. Isn't there more we should do? There is definitely more we could do. Right?  


I fully believe we as Christians are called, no commanded, to care for the orphan. I am completely convinced the orphan crisis is our problem. I do pray more Christians would step out in faith on this journey - but not out of some sense of false spirituality or fear of judgement. From a heart that says, "Lord, what do YOU want for our family? How can we follow you fully in this life? I want to take up my cross and deny myself because I know your way is so much better than mine. Break my heart with the things that break Your's." Lately I have come to realize that this verse is as much an invitation as it is a wake-up call. We will all stand before the Lord one day to give an account of our lives. I long to hear "Well done good and faithful servant" (don't you?) But more and more I am aware that He is saying to us, "Do you want more of Me? Do you want to be blessed beyond your wildest dreams? Do you want to experience a deeper walk with Me? Then follow Me. Seek first My kingdom! Act on what you know and what I am whispering in your heart."


As we have walked this journey the last year, we have been more blessed than we could have imagined. I can't begin to express in words how glad we are that we took that first scary step and then the next and then the next to find ourselves where we are today. The Lord has been reminding me lately that when we seek His will and follow Him when says, "this is the way, walk in it," it is the most exciting, best place to be. I wish I could adequately express how deeply blessed we are and how exciting it is to have a front row seat as He works and moves to accomplish His purposes in our lives. He is inviting us, all of us, to be His hands and feet and in the process to have our socks blessed off! That is exciting to me! I want that! Not out of some sense of guilt or condemnation, but because there is nowhere I would rather be than in the center of His will!


Yes, His heart is for the orphan. Adoption is His idea! And when we get on board with His plan its a wild, crazy, blessed ride! 


Today, Lord, I say "yes" - I accept your invitation. Help me to know Your will and walk in Your ways.